Pregnancy test. Who actually likes these things? If you aren't trying to get pregnant, you dread what they will say...if you are trying to get pregnant..you dread what they will say. All I know Is I should of bought stock in HPT looong ago because seriously...you spend a small fortune on these things! If you have ever been pregnant or had a pregnancy scare, you know what I am talking about. The dreaded things your mind and body do to yourself when you think you may be pregnant. I feel really tired today...Do I feel tired? Hmm..I think I sense a bit of breast tenderness...I think I am going to the bathroom more than usual...Am I pregnant? Could I be pregnant? When is my next period due? Whether we feel these symptoms or not its a constant mind battle, even before a missed period... Do I just "feel pregnant?" These feelings can be positive or negative depending on your desire to be pregnant or not. Or for those who struggle with infertility or have a hard time getting pregnant its the question...Do I really want to know what this pregnancy test will say? Do I really want to see another "NO?!" All these things can be an emotional and physical toll a woman. We may share this with our husbands..but sometimes we just keep it inside. Some of us may have close friends or family to discuss these feeling with...some of us may not...Some of us may be alone and scared. But there is somebody out there who understands. We are not alone, we are not weird, demented or crazy. So here's my place. These are my thoughts. I too am a woman dealing with crazy and worry some feelings over....Pregnancy tests.
Now a days there are so many pregnancy tests... Blue dye, early response, digital, name brand, store brand. After you have had said feelings above and decided to actually BUY a pregnancy test. Now it is a question of WHAT. With my first child I felt like I spent a fortune on so many tests..all saying..no, no, no ,no. My periods were irregular and I felt like I didn't know if my body was going backwards or forwards. Luckily for me, after my son was born I became much more regular. (Yay!) So at least this time around I knew when to actually test. Me and my husband had been trying for about 6 months to conceive our second child. My son was nearing three and I was ready (well are you ever REALLY ready?) but I wanted to continue to expand our family. I had tried a few tests, not as many as before but I still had a few late periods that got all those emotions and hormones going again. So it had been about 32 days since my last period. I was expected to start the next day. I went to the store and picked up a generic Walgreen's blue dye type "early" pregnancy test. I took it and there was the teenest tinest look under a microscope faint line. I have had a false hope with a so called evaporation line (a line that appears after recommended time) with my first son, so I wasn't going to look into it too much. I also have had a really faint line a few months before, but when I tested the next morning to make sure it was a definite no.
So here I am looking at this teeny tiny faint line. Am I pregnant? Am I not? I did feel like I was having symptoms I have had with my first pregnancy, frequent urination..and really itchy dry skin. But I figured, I would wait for my period to start...day 33...day 34..I can't take it anymore and I take the next test. A teeny bit darker faint line...but still VERY faint. Hmmm... I show it to my husband... He says . "Well there defiantly is a line..." So after I frantically search the Internet for wait a "faint Pregnancy test line" means. I tell him to PLEASE go to the store and buy a "First Response Pregnancy Test" So off he went to the store to buy the "pink box" ( I have such a good hubby.) I wanted to wait so I stayed up late and waited till it had been almost four hours since the last test. I took it (it was supposed to be the "6 days before missed period" one). Same...thing...SAME THING? What the crap am I paying here for then? This is supposed to be MORE sensitive and it does the SAME thing? A crappy faint line that hardly exists, and yet tortures me endlessly? WHY FAINT LINE WHY??? So I thought well its probably because I took this test so late at night soo...I will wait again till the morning.
Why is it when you are waiting till the morning to go to the bathroom, you suddenly have to go very badly? Like every few hours toss and turn thinking..I have to go..but If I do my pregnancy test won't be as strong. Is it like when your told not to do something...you suddenly WANT to do it? So finally I made it till morning. My hands are literally shaking as I take the next pregnancy test. Its negative. Nothings there.
Feeling totally and utterly depressed I lump myself back into the bed and pull the covers over my head. At this point I have gotten notice from my husband who looks at me and asks what is wrong? Am I really crazy? Why why are these tests doing this? Why faint lines...stronger faint lines...then ...no lines...it doesn't make sense. Well only a minute or two had passed since I read the result and my husband goes into the bathroom to have a look. He flips the light on and looks closely. Its there he told me...but its super super faint. So now...I go back and look sure enough..there it is...almost FAINTER than the test I took the day BEFORE my period..and now three days past its FAINTER? So what is going on? and Still no period! So I go throughout my day and Its just eating me alive..I would just accept the fact that I am not pregnant..but it did feel different...I did feel pregnant. I did some more reading online and found a site that said A LINE IS A LINE...THE FAINTNESS DOES NOT MATTER. So why was mine getting faintER? So I decided to reach into my pocket once more..pull out another $20 and go for what I should of all a long...A DIGITAL PREGNANCY TEST.
So I bought the stinkin test. It was the only thing I bought I feel so dumb buying it as the man gives me a little smile like...have a nice day. Leave me alone..I am emotional!! So here I am again...same woman with A pregnancy test...terrified. This is it..it will say PREGNANT or NOT PREGNANT. Here it goes...
PREGNANT.
it said PREGNANT!! Oh my gosh! I was right! pregnant! I am pregnant!! So basically WTF pregnancy tests? What is your deal? Do you purposely give faint lines to make poor women like me who are so neurotic that they HAVE to know what the real answer is, will buy more and more of your tests? Is this why you sell them in packs of 5? All I know is that next time...it will purely be DIGITAL!!!
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